Love in Many Language

Rust did the test and posted on his blog. I have a similar book by Gary Chapman. Bought it in Sydney some 4 years ago. A friend borrowed it from me a few weeks ago and since he just returned me in the past week, I thought I will flip through some pages...

After my first reading of the book years ago, I did figure out what is my love language. But since the quiz was available, I thought I will give it a try :)

The Five Love Languages

My primary love languages are probably Acts of Service and Quality Time.

Complete set of results

Acts of Service:		9
Quality Time:		9
Physical Touch:		8
Words of Affirmation:		4
Receiving Gifts:		0

Information
Unhappiness in relationships, according to Dr. Gary Chapman, is often due to the fact that we speak different love languages. Sometimes we don't understand our partner's requirements, or even our own. We all have a "love tank" that needs to be filled in order for us to express love to others, but there are different means by which our tank can be filled, and there are different ways that we can express love to others.

The results were quite the same as what I had thought it was, probably except that I didn't think that both Acts of Service and Quality Time would be of equal score. Looks like I am not a gift person... but I wonder why the score is zero when I do like/enjoy gifts, especially when they are things that you would like to have/own. Well who would reject a gift right? ;)

Classical Classics

Don't know why I suddenly like classical music, particularly classical vocals. Walked into the classical room in Tower Records and as I explored the cds available in the section, I wish I could buy all the many cds which (I guess) seems relaxing and therapeutic (does this mean that I have been too stressed out??)

1) John Williams - Ultimate Guitar Collection: Will be attending his world tour guitar concert in Singapore in June. One of the Singapore Arts Festival programme, he will be here with Richard Harvey. There are a few famous guitar tunes in the album. I recalled Schindler's List played in movie "Memoirs of Geisha".

2) Hayley Westenra - Pure: This talented young girl from New Zealand sings so well! A friend introduced her cd to me and especially the song "Never Say Goodbye". Hayley also sang May It Be in movie "Lord of the Rings". My greatest discovery is that she was the girl who sang Amazing Grace in the Japanese hospital drama that I watched last Nov/Dec. Silly me thought that it was sang by Charlotte Church.

I almost bought the above cds and another classical compilation cd but I didn't. But I was glad that friend loaned me Hayley's album today!!

Talking about coincidence, I mentioned to my friend about loaning me his collection of dvds. And there, he has Sound of Music!! Didn't expect that anyone would have owned it. In the end, he also loaned me another classic Grease :)

To round it up, I caught a romantic Korean movie Daisy (watch trailer). The thing about Korean romantic movies... the cast of suave Korean man (sometimes good to be a little unshaven :P) and simply sweet, long-haired Korean woman. Somehow Korean men are always portrayed as a sensitive, romantic gentleman. There is no exception in this movie. Both men (although are macho men whose vocations involving guns and fights) have their soft, romantic and sensitive sides that makes women die for. I didn't watch the Korean drama Winter Sonata which I am sure, is definitely more 'soapy' than this movie... Anyway I got a little teary at the ending ;( When back to reality, I figured that surely Korean men are not like this in reality (they can be quite chauvinistic) and surely most men are not like those portrayed in movies - send you daisies everyday, protect and observe you from afar, built a bridge for you, learn lip-reading when you become dumb and read up on Monet because you love painting. GET REAL!! Well, the more suave man of the 2 in Daisy likes classical music too ;)

Enough said. Time to enjoy my Grease, Pure and Sound of Music :)

My Redeemer, My God

I will glory in my Redeemer
Whose priceless blood has ransomed me
Mine was the sin that drove the bitter nails
And hung Him on that judgement tree

I will glory in my Redeemer
Who crushed the power of sin and death
My only Saviour before the holy Judge
The Lamb who is my righteousness
The Lamb who is my righteousness

I will glory in my Redeemer
My life He bought, my love He owns
I have no longings for another
I'm satisfied in Him alone

I will glory in my Redeemer
His faithfulness my standing place
Though foes are mighty and rush up on me
My feet are firm, held by His grace
My feet are firm, held by His grace

I will glory in my Redeemer
Who carries me on eagle's wings
He crowns my life with loving kindness
His triumph song I'll ever sing

I will glory in my Redeemer
Who waits for me at gates of gold
And when He calls me, it will be paradise
His face forever to be hold
His face forever to be hold

My Right to Vote

[27 April 2006: My GRC is a walkover!! :)]

Singapore General Elections are heating up. I belong to the category that I don't quite read up much about the latest news about the elections, except for reading the headlines on the newspaper. In 2001, I recalled voting at one of the schools and there were 2 other opposition parties contesting against PAP then. I vaguely remembered that I was probably either in West Coast Group Representation Contituencies (GRC) or Bukit Timah GRC. Don't ask me who my Ministers are because I have no idea. I simply cannot remember :P But I must say that they have been quite good to us... My flat was given a repaint after 7-8 years and they have also been upgrading and improving the park (new playground, new pavement, new exercise facilities) which surrounds my flat.

A check on my status as a citizen shows that I have been regrouped into the Holland-Bukit Timah GRC. I have no idea how my area falls under that GRC when I live 10-15 minutes drive away from Holland or Bukit Timah (depending which part of it). It used to be Holland-Bukit Panjang and now it has been regrouped to Holland-Bukit Timah and Bukit Panjang is now on its own.

I don't know to hope if my GRC is a walkover. But I'm glad that I have the handsome Ophthalmologist Minister in my GRC :P However I also read that the line-up would be subjected to changes.

Well lets see... after the Nomination Day this Thursday... who knows maybe some opposition party decides to contest PAP for my GRC?? But really I will be happy to sleep in instead of making my way to the polling station on 6 May ;)

He Died for Me

Very delighted to have received the cd. This is the first cd that Sovereign Grace Ministries worked with Emu Music to produce this to be sold in Australia.

There are many songs that I like in the cd. One of which I have shared in my previous entries before (The Look)

When I first heard "Alas, and Did My Saviour Bleed", I liked the tune of the song. I later learnt that the lyrics were apt for personal reflection. Jesus my Saviour died for an unworthy person like me... what have I done to deserve such sacrifice on an insignficant me?

Alas, and did my Saviour bleed
And did my Sovereign die?
Would He devote that sacred head
For such a worm as I?

Was it for sins that I had done
He groaned upon the tree?
Amazing pity, grace unknown
And love beyond degree

Chorus
My Lord, why would you shed your blood,
So pure and undefiled
To make a sinful one like me
Your chosen, precious child

Well might the sun in darkness hide
And shut His glories in
When Christ the mighty Maker died
For man, the creature's sin

Thus might I hide my blushing face
While His dear cross appears
Dissolve my heart and melt my eyes to tears

Crying Baby

It was nice to see how God changed J from a person who seemed so arrogant and proud (my first impression years ago), to someone who is humble, teachable and caring and from someone who cannot imagine having babies, she is now enjoying motherhood to a 5-month-old KK (this are the real initials of the baby, unlike baby kiki ;))

J asked if I could babysit KK today, so that she can celebrate K's birthday by having dinner out with him. I immediately agreed to it! KK is a cute baby and besides I can understand how the couple would really appreciate and enjoy the quality time spent without the baby. They've not been out alone for the last 4-5 months...

I equipped myself with things that I could spent my time with. KK was supposed to be sleeping through the night until her parents come back home. I arrived to the home and was given a short crash course on how to make milk for baby, how to feed her and how to comfort her if she were to cry. I was quite confident and didn't think much about it. KK was supposed to be sleeping and besides I've had some experience in babysitting in my early teenage years. My mum worked as a babysitter whilst caring for the 3 of us at home. Being the oldest child, I have helped mum to care for the baby too - feed him/her (there were 2 babies she had cared for. Not at the same time but after the baby girl's mum decided she can take care herself, my mum took up another baby boy to babysit in the day), burp baby, change diapers, coax baby to sleep, play with baby...

5 minutes after J left the house with hubby, KK started to make some noise which sounded a little like she was crying. I could hear her over the baby monitor. I allowed her to continue making noise a little while with the hope that she might just continue sleeping. But soon, I think I better have a look at her. In the dark of the room, I could see KK's eyes opened. I comforted her by rubbing her tummy. After a while, it doesn't work and so I had to carry her up. She continued to cry intermittantly. As soon as I brought her out of her bedroom, she stopped crying. KK looked at me, probably trying to figure out who is this auntie carrying her and talking to her. She was so cute :) I put her down beside me while I tried to check my email. She just continued to be quiet and looked at me and the computer. I could even chat with KK's aunt (J's cousin) online! After about 15 minutes, KK began to suck her fingers... indication that she is hungry. So I went to make 30 ml of milk for her as instructed. But the fussy little KK quite refused to drink and preferred her thumb, fingers and all. She began to cry a little more and I tried to pacify her using many methods - sing to her, play music for her, carry her and walk around the house, checked her diapers, tried to feed her again, stood by the window to distract her with other kids playing downstairs, play her toys with her.... all these worked in their little own ways and short moments. It seemed anything I did still failed to distract her nor make her drink milk, although I knew her cries were to tell me that the poor girl is hungry. Poor KK wailed until her eyes filled with tears and her face was red....

Finally, J came home after 1.5 hours. And of course KK stopped crying upon seeing her mother and after having J fed her. Boy, this 57cm girl who probably weighs 7-8 kg had caused my arms to be aching after all the carrying!! Now I know how mothers train their biceps! KK smiled at me when I told her how she made me trained my biceps without me having to go to the gym. She seemed to be delighted to have helped me work out those muscles of mine. I wonder if she wouldn't mind me to accompany her again the next time when her parents go out without her..... ;) This doesn't deter me from babysitting her in future :)

(No photos of KK was posted up because she is shy... and girls should be taught modesty from young :P)

Weekend of Feasting

Perhaps I've been a bit slow in visiting Rochester Park - the new chic hangout place in the West of Singapore. I used to walk by this place frequently 10 years ago since my school was nearby. It was only recently that the place was developed from a place with old and cold colonial houses, into a place for people to chill out over a meal and drinks. Visited there with 2 other friends (it was not their first visit :P).

There are a handful of restaurants at Rochester Park. I would suggest that you make a reservation to your desired restaurant before you head down. We almost could not get a place on a Friday night. We had to be turned away at Graze so ended up at North Borders (which apparently tried to squeeze us in because they did not want to disappoint 3 pretty ladies... duuh...) We sat at the balcony on the second level. Being a cool day (it rained earlier part of the day), it was refreshing to be seated in the outdoors rather than inside the restaurant. North Borders serves Southwestern cuisine. The entrees that we had were tasty and not too salty (some stews tend to be too salty at times).

Chicken stew, lobster and salmon combination and lamb shank

If you would like to chill out over drinks, you could either pop over to Graze (there is a uniquely large LCD screen outside the restaurant) or to One Rochester. One Rochester was full and we had to be placed on the waiting list. Fortunately one of my friends knew one of the partners so we could enter ;) Nice place to be chilling out over nice music and drinks... unlike the loud music at pubs :P

The next day, I attended at wedding dinner at Raffles Town Club. I was pleasantly surprised that the quality of food had improved :) Didn't manage to take photos of the food.

Yesterday, a bunch of us decided to hang out for dinner to fellowship after an afternoon of badminton. We went Greenwood Avenue (along Bukit Timah, near Watten Estate). Had an early dinner at Peperoni Pizza. This was my second time there but my first time sitting inside the restaurant. This is one place you can have your grafitti hung up on the wall. You won't miss the many drawings of its patrons. Besides the drawings on the wall, you can also be kept entertained in the toilet (yes toilet!). There are many articles, jokes and writtings put up for your reading pleasure so that you won't be too bored :P

Between 5 of us, we shared a 21-inch pizza. Boy, it was huugggee!! Later we figured that it would probably be good for 3 girls OR 2 hungry boys. The crust is rather thin (and crispy) so you won't be having carbohydrate overload. The rainy Sunday late afternoon made us wanted to just hang around and be lazy... To complete our meal, we adjourned to Estivo for gelato. Surely Greenwood is another area which you would not want to miss out. There are other restaurants in the same stretch - good food and nice (romantic) ambience. So go check it out!!

Lazy Sunday :)

And just as I was thinking of where my favourite Roti John stall has moved to... I found out that it has shifted to Serangoon Gardens. There used to be a food centre at Taman Serasi (near Botanical Gardens) but it has since been pulled down. Any Serangoon kid would care to fill me in as to exactly which stall it is?? I think the soursop juice stall also moved here right? ;)

Psychic Mind Reader

This is quite cool. Try it! (Click on the picture above for the web link)

My Favourite Things

Recently saw the preview of "Sound of Music" movie which was due to be shown on tv. Made me realise that I have actually (don't laugh at me) not watch the movie at all!! Saw little parts of the movie from time to time. But I can't recall why I did not manage to watch this classic.

Last night, one of the songs in the movie Do-Re-Mi was sung to me :)

And just a while ago, whilst I was in the public area of my office, I heard the piano instrumental version of the song My Favourite Things. Thought that all these were pretty coincidental. Where I am seated, I cannot hear the public annoucement clearly. But as I happen to step out into the public area, soothing music was played and there it was - My Favourite Things from the "Sound of Music".

Of all the songs, My Favourite Things and Sixteen Going On Seventeen are one of my favourites. Looking at the list of the 'favourite things', those in bold are what I like :)

Raindrops on roses and whiskers on kittens

Bright copper kettles and warm woolen mittens

Brown paper packages tied up with strings

These are a few of my favorite things

Cream colored ponies and crisp apple strudels

Doorbells and sleigh bells and schnitzel with noodles

Wild geese that fly with the moon on their wings

These are a few of my favorite things

Girls in white dresses with blue satin sashes

Snowflakes that stay on my nose and eyelashes

Silver white winters that melt into springs

These are a few of my favorite things

When the dog bites

When the bee stings

When I'm feeling sad

I simply remember my favorite things

And then I don't feel so bad

Where is the nearest vcd shop for me to rent the movie??

One Flaw in Women

Got this through mass email. After reading it through, I could think of one girlfriend who would agree with this :P

Women have strengths that amaze men.
They bear hardships and they carry burdens,
but they hold happiness, love and joy.

They smile when they want to scream.
They sing when they want to cry.
They cry when they are happy
and laugh when they are nervous.

They fight for what they believe in.
They stand up to injustice.
They don't take "no" for an answer
when they believe there is a better solution.

They go without so their family can have.
They go to the doctor with a frightened friend.
They love unconditionally.

They cry when their children excel
and cheer when their friends get awards.
They are happy when they hear about
a birth or a wedding.
Their hearts break when a friend dies.
They grieve at the loss of a family member,
yet they are strong when they
think there is no strength left.

They know that a hug and a kiss
can heal a broken heart.
Women come in all shapes, sizes and colors.
They'll drive, fly, walk, run or e-mail you
to show how much they care about you.

The heart of a woman is what
makes the world keep turning.
They bring joy, hope and love.
They have compassion and ideas.
They give moral support to their
family and friends.

Women have vital things to say
and everything to give.
HOWEVER, IF THERE IS ONE FLAW IN WOMEN,
IT IS THAT THEY FORGET THEIR WORTH.

Girl Talk Two

Had a night of chatter catching up with watermelon girl. Girls' chatter - besides talking about men :P we also talked about ministry and relationships with other friends.

Watermelon girl shared with me an analogy that a male friend of hers told her. Imagine a couple trying to climb the hills. The man has their little daughter on his back, carrying her to climb the hills and the woman by herself. The woman, being worried for the safety of her daughter and husband, will remind her husband to be careful. She does it out of concern for both the husband and daughter. But for the husband, after repeated reminders, will tend to think that his wife should stop nagging and wonders if the reason for her constant nagging is because she doesn't trust him to take care of their daughter.

The analogy sounds quite apt to illustrate the different mindset of man and woman. Watermelon girl and I spoke about real situations that were similar to the situation above. Man from mars and woman from venus - true? The woman did it out of concern but the man reads a different message and begins to be fustrated. Of course this can happen in the reverse manner, say e.g. the husband comes home after work, feels tired and sits down in front of the tv to relax. Wife will probably get the idea that he doesn't care about her after a whole day of not seeing her. (Disclaimer: I am only stating general scenarios. It doesn't mean all men or all women are the same)

I read that famous book Men from Mars and Women from Venus some years back. It seemed that it was quite right when the different behaviours and responses of man and woman were painted out. Many of them seemed typical of a man and woman relationship. But it is also because of the differences that causes conflicts.

Well I guess we can still thank God for creating man and woman to be different. If they're the same, life would be boring - without differences and conflicts. Differences can be complementary and yet they can also cause conflicts. But resolved conflicts under God's hand, can grow and mature 2 persons in a relationship. I maintain that this is the most beautiful thing in a relationship :)

Watermelon girl and hubby-to-be are starting to pen their relationship down in a book. The idea is to record the things they learn in their relationship/marriage as they go along, rubbing shoulders, arguing, quarreling and the reconciliations... And some time later, the book can be useful for reflection and reminders of how God has saw them through and taught them in particular areas of their relationship. I pray for them that they will continue to depend on God for their relationship and marriage, to serve each other in humility and to love each other selflessly.

My Heart Sank...

A woman's intuition/sixth sense.... is it always that accurate? I have had quite a number of such intuitions turning out to be correct. Sometimes it scares me to know that the slightest bit of passing thoughts are actually the truth and not just a wild guess/thought. When the thoughts are of good and joyful things, I am happy. But when the thoughts are not what I really hoped to happen, then I will be saddened to realise that what I had thought of/predicted proved to be right...

A passing thought I had of a sister-in-Christ (SIC) turned out to be true - she is dating a non-believer. Doesn't sound very extraordinary isn't it? I mean in our lives, there would have been some people in our circles whom we would probably know are dating non-believers. But I am saddened still. My heart sank when I learnt the truth. SIC and I have shared on a few occasions about our struggles as single women. SIC has turned down many potential suitors because they were non-believers. I was encouraged by her... But she has now given up the 'fight'. I guess I can understand the great temptation as a Christian single woman, to be tempted to consider nice men who are really really nice, someone who can be your soul mate, share the same interests and probably good-looking as well. The struggle gets more difficult when our biological clock is ticking.

How about 'missionary dating'? Is it valid and 'excuseable'? In some examples that I can recall: I have had a good friend, who dated a non-believer and later her boyfriend (then) became a believer and now they are happily married. Another SIC A also dated a non-believer for 2 years. Her boyfriend became Christian and they were recently married. SIC B was struggling in a friendship with a non-believer. Now he is a Christian but they remained good friends. Ironically or not, I also just had of a brother-in-Christ (BIC), whose non-believer girlfriend recently had accepted Christ.

I do rejoice with each person who come to know Christ but I have mixed feelings about 'missionary dating'. Yes, as believers, we are called to share the gospel. To share the gospel with someone you like... still sounds ok. But to get into the relationship, then start to pray for that person and share the gospel with him/her, I would be uncomfortable. If God is leading that person you like to believe in Jesus Christ, do you need to be in a boy/girl relationship to be able to share Christ? Most non-believers know that Christians should only marry Christians and (usually) will not date non-Christians. As a Christian, if I consent to date a non-believer (given the basic understanding that dating is to consider that person for marriage and not for the fun of it), wouldn't he think that I am compromising in some ways... compromising God?

There was a discussion at church camp last year... one pastor (or was it pastor's wife?) said if (for example) I was dating a non-believer and I painfully decided to end the relationship (or perhaps chose not to begin in the beginning) because I want to obey God, this action can result in 2 possibilities: (1) the guy will be so stumbled by Christians that he may condemn the gospel, but (2) there is a chance that the guy will leave the relationship, realising that the God whom I believe in is greater and far more important than him. This may even cause him to find out why I believe in Jesus Christ that I will choose to end a relationship with him. If this man cares for me enough, he may find out why I love God more and he may truly know and accept the gospel himself. How he may come to know the gospel will not be that important. But if I genuinely care for him, I would be most concerned about his salvation! Being in a relationship with him seems to show that I love him more than I love my Lord Jesus Christ, that I choose to please the guy I like or please my own desires, than pleasing God!

I am not finding excuses for those who are dating non-believers... but often then not, I realise there are 2 scenarios: (1) he/she is struggling real hard, open to people's advice and talking to others about the struggle and having a Christian to be accountable to and praying with. (2) he/she struggles, but only want to listen to the 'good' and sieve out the preachy bits. He/she would usually only share with those whom he/she thinks can 'accept' and understand what he/she is going through. Usually, he/she will end up leaving Christian fellowship for the fear of condemnation of 'doing something wrong'. Generally I think I can understand but I cannot accept. Its loving the sinner but hate the sin. But I must admit that it is not easy to do so. How to best love the SIC or BIC, being able to empathise with him/her, yet also being there for him/her as they struggle? I can simply say "you are wrong, and downright wrong and I shall not talk to you if you are gonna continue the relationship". But this isn't the love that God has for His people. He doesn't leave us sinners in the lurch...

I just recalled a very good guy friend of mine who used to be a godly Christian, now have forsaken God after he dated a non-Christian and later married her. To quote from quop, who quoted the thoughts of his friend: "How can a non-Christian husband lead a Christian wife to Christ-likeness? On the other hand, how can a non-Christian wife be lead into Christ-likeness? If a husband is to love his wife as Christ loved the church, by laying down his life in order to present his church holy and blameless, then how can that happen if the husband does not love Christ (and hence, can not love as he loved?)"

I pray for wisdom and love to face any SIC or BIC who are struggling in this aspect. I surely am no saint to be able to handle this well. For myself, I thank God that I was able to be convicted since many years ago, that I cannot date a non-believer. I had a close girl friend when I was a teenager. But no matter how close we are, I realise she could never understand why I think certain ways or make certain decisions as a Christian. I found myself able to 'click' in this aspect with another girl Christian friend. If this was so with a close girl friend, what more with my boyfriend or potential husband? But as the years go by, although my conviction is still strong, I do not throw away the possibility that I, one day, may fall into this temptation myself. I mean, who knows right? I had ever considered a guy whom I could relate well with, nice gentleman and good-looking. But thank God he was not that much interested in me to pursue me (or perhaps he knew I won't consider him because he is not a Christian??). (Hmm at this point, I suddenly recalled) there was a guy who was interested in me some years back. He expressed interest but he also knew that I will not date a non-believer. He was opened to my invitation to evangelistic events and he himself went to search for the answers to why this God is so special to me. Some time later, he himself accepted Christ when he went to his friend's church. Nothing at all came out from his interest for me. If anything, it had triggered him to know who is this Christ. Thank God for His work!

I also pray for myself that I never will have to face the temptation of considering a non-believer. I thank God that at least for now, I need not be tempted :) But what I need to learn for now, is how to treat those are struggling in this in love and kindness...

Hello, Everybody!!

Hello everyone! I am baby kiki. (Auntie island thinks that my real name should not be disclosed, hence "kiki" shall be used.) Mummy gave birth to me on the morning of 4 April 2006 after waiting anxiously (and painfully!!) in the hospital for close to 24 hours!

Anyway, thank God that mummy was okay in the process of bringing me into this world... and thank God that I am a healthy little boy :) So far, daddy and mummy thinks that I am a good boy because I drink my milk without much fuss... and when daddy holds me to get me to burp, I burped with a loud buurrrrp which makes daddy and mummy happy :)

Although I am still quite shy about the people and things around me, I still attempted to smile at auntie island when she tries to take my photo. I think I do have some of mummy's facial features... but auntie island tells me that I look more like daddy and that I will grow up to be a tall and handsome man like my daddy!!

Okie.... when my auntie island gets to know more about me, she may share more news and photos of me. So hope to see you real soon!! ;)

Girl Talk

Was having girl talk with a friend... Her response amuses me. The details of the conversation cannot be revealed but she was so amused by the girls' behaviour in a relationship that she could write it all in a book!

I am also kinda amused by our conversation. Made me recall some mass emails I receive which came in some powerpoint slides and one of the quotes relating to the word "Nothing" goes like this.....

Rules from the Male Side

If we ask what's wrong and you say "nothing", we will act like nothing's wrong. We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.

Words Women Use

"Nothing" - calm before the storm. This means "something" and you should be on your toes. Arguments that begin with "nothing" usually ends with "fine".

Of course the above is meant to be kind of taken as a pinch of salt. It seemed like this is the way how man and woman behave in a relationship, or the common mindset of the mars and venus.

In an article "What Does a Biblical Relationship Look Like?", it tells the reader about the difference between biblical courtship and modern dating. For most Christians I know, they believe and understand that a man will court a particular woman because he believes it is possible that he could marry her, and the courtship is the process of discerning whether that belief is correct, as the motive in a relationship.

As for the mindset in a relationship, the author of the above article Scott Croft says that:

Selfishness is not what drives a biblical marriage, and therefore should not be what drives a biblical courtship. Biblical courtship recognizes the general call to "do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourselves" (Phil. 2:3, NIV). It also recognizes the specific call that Ephesians 5:25 gives men in marriage, where our main role is sacrificial service. We are to love our wives as Christ loved the church, giving himself up for her. That means loving sacrificially every day. Biblical courtship means that a man does not look for a laundry list of characteristics that comprise his fantasy woman so that his every desire can be fulfilled, but he looks for a godly woman as Scripture defines her — a woman he can love and, yes, be attracted to, but a woman whom he can serve and love as a godly husband.

In other words, modern dating asks, "How can I find the one for me?" while biblical courtship asks, "How can I be the one for her?"

The difference between a biblical mindset and the secular mindset: selflessness and selfishness. Selflessness or being other-person-centred mirrors Christ-likeness. That is how God loves us. Selfishness belongs to our sinful nature. This might be common knowledge for most of us. But in practice, it is difficult to always be selfless and being other-person-centred... I guess we are only able to do so by God's grace, by trusting and depending on Him.

Hmm, wonder if the book that my friend thought of writing may be the bestseller of the year?? Or will it be something that no publishing company would accept to print?? :P

Church @ Bishan

A red banner hangs outside a secondary school in Bishan. Church is now at Bishan at least for the next 1 year.

Last weekend was the first service at the school. The sitting capacity is double that of our old building. With that, the task of songleading seems more daunting because there are 600 pairs of eyes looking, compared to previously 350 pairs. I'm glad that God is far greater than my anxiety and the many pairs of eyes looking at me. Despite having 2 practices at a music studio, we still made quite a number of boo-boos, be it the singing or the music, or rather, the combination of it. Having a school hall with high ceilings makes sound a big challenge. The best of words you say on stage and the best of voice and music we sing and play can be a disaster when sound cannot project it clearly. But I thank God still because I trust that His word will still dwell in people's hearts and the words of the songs we sang will minister to them. Its not how well we play nor how good we sing, but that the truth of Jesus Christ will prevail and proclaimed.

At the beginning of the service, I shared with the congregation how I am excited about the change that the church is going through. I am excited because everyone is going through this together and I wonder how church life will be like in the new place for the next 12 to 18 months. I'm glad the church does not comprise of a physical building but a gathering of God's people, coming together to hear God's word and to fellowship with one another. Even though we now change the physical building to gather, this does not stop us from learning God’s word, to fellowship with one another and to grow in godliness.

Being in a new place may mean inconvenience for some. At least in the music team, there are more things for us to do - to set up and to keep the equipment. I'm not complaining. I am thankful by the fact that we have a place to gather. In fact, after the morning services, we can make use of the school hall to play games like badminton and can even play basketball at the court! This would help promote exercise and greater fellowship :)

I guess I will eventually miss the old church building... after all, I've been there for 7 years. I know where some people will hang out, where to find people, where to get some things, etc... but hey, I surely will grow to get used to life at the school as well! And before I know it, we will be back at Adam Road!!