Parenting - Teenage Years

I was being engaged into a converation this morning. Some doctors were lamenting how their teenage or adult children are/were rebellious... whether girls are more rebellious than boys.

Doctor A: There! Ask her (me) if girls are more rebellious than boys
Me: Not really, I still think generally boys are more rebellious
Doctor A: Are you that naughty and rebellious when you were younger?
Me: Of course not! I was a good girl, 乖 girl
Doctor B: Are you sure?
Me: Yeah! You can go ask my mum :)

Well I think I had been generally quite a good girl in my teenage years. By God's grace, I did not mix with bad company with whom I could have very well ended up as a "McDonald's kid" or "Centrepoint kid" (at my time, a "McDonald's kid" means that you hang out at McDonald's after school and they usually carry the tag of being a juvenile, smoker, poor in studies, etc)

Amidst the 7-8 doctors who had children who were at least in their teenager years or even older than me, they were exchanging stories of how their children were/are doing badly in their studies (because they were lazy and not because they are academically poor), spending money excessively, picked up smoking, etc. In one example, he sent his son to Australia to study. In his first year there, he spent $100,000!! After the first year, he took his son to his clinic to sit down with him for one whole day. He purposely chose a day where he did not have any patients. From there, his son understood that money does not come easily even though his dad is a doctor. Subsequently, his expenditure was down to $25,000 per year.

I gave a comment that if they want to understand their children more, get to know them and the friends whom they hang out with. Invite their friends over, talk to them and know how they are like. In that way, parents can know why their children behave in a certain way and at least to be knowing what kind of influence the friends have on their children. Every teenager would undergo peer pressure and friends would be very important to them. Doctor A said that I sounded like I am very experienced! But of course I actually speak as the capacity of a child. After all, who am I to be 'experienced' when I am young enough to be their child?!

In the 10-15 minutes I was standing there, I felt like telling them one thing - it is ultimately the parents' responsibility to educate/teach/discipline their children. Teachers can help only that much. How your children turn out to be, is reflective of how you have been as parents. God gave parents the mandate to teach him/her in the ways of the Lord, to bring him/her up to know Christ. Even if the parents are not believers of Christ, the responsibility of teaching and educating moral values still remained.

Seeing how some of my friends parent their children, I have been impressed with how some of them teach them. At the end of the day, parents can teach the children but they cannot totally control what they would do and think. Godly parenting has to have godly wisdom and also total trust and dependance on Christ for the person that he/she will turn out to be.

Fruits and Nuts

I generally like the combination of fruits and nuts. I like chocolates with fruits and nuts. Hmm... and I like the Post cereal of almonds and cranberries :)

Haven't done this for a long time - baking! Bought 2 silicon baking trays from Crazy Clarks in Australia. I didn't quite believe that this was good because the rubbery tray looks kinda filmsy and the new tray has a layer of powdery coating on it. But in the departmental stores in Australia, they are sold for the range of A$20-40. At Crazy Clarks, I saw the regular loaf pan for A$8 and a 12-piece muffin tray for the same price! I thought this was quite good. The silicon is thick and there isn't any powdery coating so I bought both of them. I decided to use it today to bake :)

Auntie gave me a packet of walnuts. So I decided to bake a walnut cake. It happened that there were bananas at home and so I baked a banana walnut cake :) I also saw that the blueberries at the supermarket was quite reasonably priced. Decided to buy some and put into my almond cake. I am very pleased with the cakes. Especially the almond blueberry cake. This was the first time I tried adding blueberries into my cake!

I shall pose the recipes up another time. Here are the photos of my cakes! Yummy-licious!

Banana walnut cake - before and after...

Almond blueberry cake - before and after...

Stress Relief

Imperial salts shared this and so I thought I will go try playing the games :) There are many available and it seems like it targets ladies :P Anyhow do go try them when you want some stress relief from... work?? ;)

The Last..... Tears....

No 1: The Last Meal

Spent most of my past 2 weeks in Brissie. Auntie gave thanks to God for the lunch that she prepared before we enjoyed it together. This was 2 hours before my scheduled departure flight. She gave thanks for me being able to be spending time over there to know the family, friends and him. She prayed for journey mercies for me. Simple content, simple words by a simple her over a simple meal... I found my nose to be slightly sniffing and holding back the water that began to wet my contact lenses. I am also filled with thankfulness for the opportunity and time that I am able to spend there. Uncle and auntie have shown me great love and hospitality. Their humility and love has touched me.

No 2: The Last Look

I looked out of the window as the Boeing 777 was reversing from gate 82. I was sure that I was not thinking much in my mind... I do not even remember what I was thinking about. For some reason, my eyes were wet once again. Sniffing away, I held most of it back as I was a little embarrassed and mindful, in case the passenger beside me realised what was happening to me... No words, no reasons and not feeling any particular emotion. I only know that I was wiping the drops off my face.

No 3: The Last Movie

Channel-surfed the many choices made available to me on the flight. I watched 3 movies at the same time, switching from one to another every few minutes. After they were completed, I watched the last 3/4 of the Singapore-made movie "I Not Stupid Too" as I was snacking and served dinner.

“When was the last time you praised someone? When was the last time someone praised you?” These two questions set the audience thinking at the start of Jack Neo’s latest film, I Not Stupid Too.

I Not Stupid Too is a comedy that probes into the difficult relationships parents have with their children. Like its predecessor, I Not Stupid Too is set in fast-paced Singapore, with the world seen through the eyes of Jerry, Tom’s brother and the baby of the family. Although their family is considerably wealthy, the brothers often face immense pressures from school and their parents, played by Jack Neo and Xiang Yun. On the other side of the spectrum, we also have Cheng Cai who is often misunderstood and has an abusive father who does not know how to express his love and concern for his son.

The movie strikes a chord as it showcases how parents often only see and focus on their children’s weaknesses, albeit with good intentions of wanting them to be the best they can be. However, many a times, parents lose focus and often forget that praise itself is a form of fuel to propel improvements. Such is the case in the movie as Mr Fu, a conservative Mother Tongue teacher, only began to worm his way into his students’ hearts after he began to focus on their positive side and more importantly, starts dishing out the praises.

Jack Neo still relies heavily on his successful model of directing whereby social issues and governmental policies in Singapore are all given their due exposure. Cast-wise, both Shawn Lee and Joshua Ang, who remain from the movie’s prequel, I Not Stupid, have grown up tremendously and matured after four years, clearly displaying depth to their acting. The introduction of 8-year-old Jerry, played by Ashley Leong, also adds another dimension to the movie. His innocence and naivety successfully splashes humour into the movie, lightening up the sometimes somber atmosphere.

Although some parts of the show were obviously done up to create tear-jerking moments but with cheeky animations and antics right after those moments, I Not Stupid Too had me burst out laughing even when my tears were still drying. Indeed, this is a commendable effort by Jack Neo that points to the clear lack of the showing of appreciation in our society today.

- from Nanyang Technological University Students' Union E-Tribune

For a 3rd and 4th time on the same day, the tear ducts of my eyes were working. There were a few touching moments when you see how the parent-child relationship was worsen and later reconciled... moments of reconcilation, understanding and love. I can't really describe very well. You have to see the movie for yourself. Part 1 "I Not Stupid" was also a good movie but perhaps I kinda prefer this sequel.

INST reminded me that in our communication with others, we should learn to accenturate the positive. Instead of looking at the negative side of things, learn to encourage others positively. Appreciate the little things given and done (by God and by people). Say a word of praise. Give a word of encouragement. It serves to improve our relationships with one another... It doesn't cost you much to say a "thank you" but it can possibly mean a big deal to the person whom you thanked. I think everyone needs to learn this skill... but do so genuinely and sincerely, not artificially.


All the tears aside, I was delighted to be able to see snow flakes once again. The reason why I got a window seat was to be able to see and snap photos of them. Silly me used to think that those were little cracks of the glass due to the air pressure. But I didn't realise that they were God's creation :) Someone said "Man made ice cubes. God made snow flakes". Snow flakes cannot be man-made right?? Each snow flake is uniquely different and there are no 2 same flake. Sounds like human beings ay? God created us as individuals. Identical twins may look similiar but their personalities would be different. We are all uniquely created.

Snow flakes!! :)

Other nice photos from my trip:

Sunset at Currimandi Lake, Sunshine Coast

Shadows

Clouds at an open-air shopping centre

Sunset at Mount Cootha. See the reflection of sunset on the mirrored walls? Can you spot me in the mirror?? ;)

4th Trip to Sydney

Its more than half way through my holiday... I spent the weekend in Sydney meeting up with many people.

This isn't my first trip to the most crowded city of Oz. But I always like to visit some places which I like in Sydney. A pity that I was only there for 4 days and hence I could not go many places this time. However I was happy to have breathe the air and view the scenery at Coogee Beach and to be walking around in the city a couple of times. I love the cold air at beaches in winter Australia. I love walking in the streets of Sydney, being in the midst of the many office and shopping buildings that looks completely different from Singapore's Orchard Road and Shenton Way.

Blue skies and waters at Coogee Beach

In Sydney city, I couldn't help to snap photos which I have taken before. Sitting down at "Passionflower" having ice cream and waffles in the cool winter breeze and looking out to dusk at Darling Harbour... I am contented to just relax there the entire afternoon (I did not manage to do so :P) It was also a nice experience too, to be sipping hot chocolate from Lindt Chocolate Shop at Martin Place. This is the first and only Lindt Chocolate Shop in Australia. I was so tempted to buy loads of chocolate back. But thinking of how fattening it can be... and I can get Lindt chocolates off the shelves in Singapore anyway... so I didn't buy any.

Places in Sydney

The main reason why I went Sydney was to attend TWIST music conference. John Dickson spoke at the conference. I attended workshop electives which had to do with leading songs and singing. Although I think I didn't learn anything very new, I thought that it was a different experience to be hearing from a community of God's people from a different country. Unexpectedly, I got to meet a few other people who used to be attending my church in Singapore. It was a good time to catch up with them and mutually encouraging one another.

TWIST photos

Also got to meet up with W's friends in Sydney and catching up with DK, MH and the Fongs over dinner. For the 4 days, quality time was spent. God created us as relational beings. I am thankful for the time and fellowship I had in Sydney :)

Old Old Friend

We have not met for 4 years... Y's daughter is already 5 years old! W and I went to meet Y for dinner in the city. Thereafter I spent the night at Y's. The next day, Y and I had a girls' time out together since she has the day off. We had lunch and shopped around Paddington. One of Y's favourite hangout when she was a student was Paddington. Her favourite place is Sassazar's which she had brought me there the last time I visited her in 2002. This time, we went back there for lunch again.

We also walked around some shops in that area - antique house, flower shop/cafe, chocolate shop and shops which sells interesting assessories, homeware, jellewery, etc. It was a leisure time for the 2 of us to spent, before we did the homemaker thing - grocery shopping and picking up kid from school.

True old friends really don't change. They are always there in your life. But surely circumstances in life has moulded all of us. My only prayer is that Y and family will come to know Christ...

Flower Shop Cafe has fresh beautiful flowers and paintings of them

Food and shopping at Paddington

Leisure lunch and great weather!

I Love the Weather!

I don't mean the weather in Singapore. I mean the weather in Australia! Its winter time and where I am, its bright, sunny and breezy in the day and cold with shivers at night. Maybe I have been the cold-deprived Singaporean so I have always love winters in Aussieland. It was so nice to be walking around the vicinity where I am living, with the bright sun and cool/cold breeze. The air smells extremely fresh!

In the backyard where I live, there are many fruits and vegetables that are grown. Being a city dweller, I derived cheap thrill from plucking the fresh fruits off the tree/plant and eating those that I picked from the garden. I admit I don't have green fingers. I doubt I can ever grow such a garden. But its really nice to be able to reap from the 'harvest' without growing them myself :P There are pomelo, cherry tomato, guava, papaya, snow peas, passion fruit, lemon, lime, chako (I have never seen nor eaten such vegetable. Its like some gourd and usually stir fried with other vegetables) and all other vegetables that I don't know the names of :P

And here is a collage of some food I have been eating for the last few days.... Eating out here is more expensive than Singapore...

Shall update more another time! :)

What Now From Here??

Read Mrs Chng's sharing on how God has led her thus far, I could identify with her and was encouraged that our Almighty God has also led me and brought me here.

When I was a little girl, mum decided to let me attend Sunday School with my auntie so that I could be exposed to English-speaking people (I speak Mandarin at home). I was happy attending Sunday School because I never liked visiting Chinese temples because of the incense smoke, heat, etc... I'd prefer knowing a God in air-conditioned room. I know this was very shallow and silly of me, but I had the chance to know the gospel because of that. As a child, I probably just had a simple faith. When I was 12 and had to go through PSLE, I prayed that I will have 4 As (I was happy with A grade instead of A* grade). My prayer was answered and I was so delighted. So generally, God then to me was someone whom I hardly knew much, except that He is my Saviour and I would bring my prayer requests to Him.

When I was 15, some Youth for Christ people came to my school to share the gospel. Through an evangelistic rally, I said the sinner's prayer again after trully understanding that we all need God and to repent of my sins to bridge my relationship with God. Fortunately, I had some friends who came together to study the Bible together. That was the only source of 'food' I had since I had stopped going Sunday School then (it moved away) and my parents did not allow me to attend church. At my prelim exams, I scored a 14 (which was not exactly very good. 6 being the best and 20 was the other end of the scale). With that score, I could barely enter the Junior College of my choice. I had to appeal into the college. I tried to appeal through choir but they decided that I cannot sing so I failed my audition. Somehow, the principal granted my appeal into the college. After 3 months, my GCE O Levels exam results came out and I was shocked that I had a score of 16 (worse than my prelims). I had to appeal to remain in the college. This time, I didn't know the reasons that I could appeal with. By God's grace, my form teacher then quite like me. And so she put in a good word to the principal for me to allow me to stay on.

In the college, I soon joined the Students' Council (leadership body of the school). I probably had played around too much and didn't focus on my studies. To begin with, I wasn't very bright. At the end of the first year, I learnt that 5 students in the Council had to leave the Council because of their first year results and they had to be retained for another year. But I also heard that there was 1 out of the 5 who might have some hope to be 'saved'. Little did I expect that it turned out to be me. My Economics teacher gave me 2 more points so that I could meet the passing mark. My highest grade in college then was (ashamedly) an E (A-E are passing grades. F is a fail). I tried to study hard but still playing at the same time... and at my final GCE A Levels exam, I scored D for all my 3 subjects. At that time, I didn't mind if I stopped studying because I think life just carry on and I can find a job. I was happy with just that.

It seemed like I could possibly enter Singapore Institute of Management (SIM) to study a Bachelor of Science in Management. I applied for it, since I didn't hear from my application to National University of Singapore. Both the replies got to me at about the same time - I was accepted both sides. Although I had the choice, I was perplexed. I'd rather the decision was made for me. I remembered asking God why He had to give me a choice. At the end, I chose to go NUS since that was more of a 'normal' route that most would take. However at Science faculty, I could not major in anything I liked. I ended up taking Biochemistry (which any medicine student will tell you that it was the most boring and hated medical subjects). Without taking Biology in college, Biochemistry was an extremely tough course for me. In my 1st and 2nd year, I also served in the Christian Fellowship in varsity. But in that same 2 years (4 semesters), I had failed 6 modules out of 16 modules! It was a difficult time to accept 1-2 failures every semester. Come the 3rd year, after a long and emotionally-draining election in the CF for leadership position, I actually got elected into the Executive Committee. It was draining me because I had thought to serve as a secretary or treasurer but I was not elected. Then came many friends encouraging me to go for the Evangelism Coordinator role. I agreed since there was no other people standing for the position. To my surprise, there came 2 other guys who stood for election. I told God that I give up and not wanting to run for elections anymore. The 2 men were so much more eligible to be Evangelism Coordinator. Compared with them, I was so so inadequate! I do not know the reason how and why I was the one elected.

The next challenge came my studies - how to manage it with my involvement in CF? It became the biggest struggle for me. To make it worse, I had to repeat 2 modules in my 3rd year 1st semester. During exam time, I came down with flu. It was really difficult to prepare for exams with a failing body. At one exam for my repeat module, I actually fell asleep whilst writing. I could not stay awake because I was sick. I was so angry with myself for being sick and asked God why I had to be sick. I left the exam hall crying, cannot imagine if I had to take that module a 3rd time... At another paper, I fell asleep also, only to wake up and realise I wrote rubbish for my essay whilst in the semi-conscious state. When my results came back, I scored a C grades for all my modules!! Up till that time, my best grade was only a D (A-D and F for fail) for any Biochemistry modules I did. (I always score A and B for my minor in computer programming) It was a miracle for me and I do not know how I did it. I knew that it was God and not me. How could I be more involved in ministries, was terribly sick and still did better in my exams than usual??? I was baffled at the results and it had caused me to completely surrender to God for my life. No matter what I do or how I do, God is still sovereign and He is in control of all things.

I don't think the lesson learnt was that when I serve God more, I will get more in return. But that I have to trust God, even when things seemed to be going wrong. Eventually I had to spend one more year to complete my degree so that I could pass all my essential modules. I had to catch up with my earlier failures. I did not feel ashamed of staying back for one year although it was very tempting to. That one year had given me an opportunity to go for a Missions training programme when I went Macau. That extra year also granted me a chance to work part-time, by which that experience had put me in a better position for this current job that I am doing.

As I had shared all these with my DG mate 2 weeks ago, I had encouraged myself in the process of sharing because I had been reminded of God's hands in my life. If I hadn't been serving as a leader in my 3rd year, I would not have thought of changing to a church which had good teaching of God's word. I would not have been so blessed by God's people in the time I served in church. Everything in my life seemed to have been mapped out. With every decision (good and bad) I made, things had never been out of control because the Lord my God is in control and He knows best.

Yet it remained a challenge for me to continue to trust God in my life. It is so easy for me now to look back and say "Hey God has brought me thus far!" But when you are in the situation of uncertainty and wonder what's next, it is difficult. So there comes God's Word and His people that reminded me to press on. It doesn't quite matter what becomes of me, as long as in whatever circumstance that God has put me in, I remain faithful to Him, trusting Him and depending on Him to live a godly life until I see Him face to face. Lord, may your grace be sufficient for me and help me to trust You completely.

Happy Birthday!!

Happy birthday to you... happy birthday to you... happy birthday to myislandthots.... happy birthday to you....

It has been a year since the birth of this blog. How time flies! It seemed like only a few months ago that I began this blog. Including this entry, I have posted 149 entries for one year, averaging 1 entry every 2-3 days!

Blogging has been an avenue to share my thoughts and reflections on issues, occasions, matters - thoughts that I would like to share with my friends, some of them hopefully can be a blessing. As I write and especially when I read my past entries, it helps me see how I have grown (or not grown :p) in my faith and in my adulthood. It keeps me accountable sometimes, as I write on my reflections on God's word.

Blogging has also been an avenue whereby my friends (local and overseas) get in touch with what has been happening in my life. Blogging has helped me linked up old friends from my school days. Reading others' blogs, especially those from my church, has helped to encourage me and to know them better. Blogging has allowed me to know new friends (actually just one friend) miles away.

I don't know how long I will continue to keep this blog. But I do hope that this blog would serve to encourage the readers and for me to share good and interesting photos, songs, food, places, people, thoughts, etc...

I Like You, I Like You Not

I like to eat some food, but I don't like some others.

Strawberry
I LIKE strawberry smoothie, strawberry yoghurt, strawberry fruit (when it is sweet).
I DON'T quite LIKE strawberry milk, strawberry milkshake, strawberry ice-cream.

Sesame
I LIKE sesame seeds in a bun, sesame seeds as garnish on some foods, sesame tang yuan.
I DON'T LIKE sesame paste aka 芝麻糊.

Durian
I LIKE durian fruit (but I cannot have too much of it).
I DON'T LIKE durian cakes, durian paste, durian chips.

Pistachio
I LIKE Pistachio nut.
I DON'T LIKE Pistachio ice-cream.

Mint
I LIKE mint chocolate, mint tea, mint sweets.
I DON'T LIKE mint ice-cream.

Cherry
I LIKE cherry fruit, cherry yoghurt, cherry ice-cream.
I DON'T LIKE cherry chocolate, cherry sweets.

I can't explain the above. Perhaps my taste buds doesn't connect well with my brain cells.